There is one story that goes with this sublime culmination of sounds that make me laden with goosebumps. The story? Oh, how well I feel I can articulate this... This is the song that aided my bane... This is the song I weep to... This song became the soundtrack to my change... This song is the backdrop I use to aurally fathom how pathetic, and just how sad it is that, in our one existence, we confine ourselves to bubbles of certain routines that limit our life experiences. We become slaves to the small world around us. I don't want to be another slave, stuck on a mere salary, in our world of services tasks, especially if that doesn't ever get me to where I eventually want to be in my one damn existence. Oh, no... I will do my own thing, and take my own, entrepreneurial path, to make my own genesis. I bow out, and refuse to be an essential slave. I must make my dreams of a beautiful freedom, and a controlled hedonism, happen, else I sidestep normality should I fail, residing to only doing my likes. Though no... I must take the correct paths to create such staggering success, via talents, business, serially investing, inventing, and helping. I must 'think rich', not be comfortable, and capture this world, proliferating with an appreciation and acknowledgement of those around me. I will pull down on my insanity, making an attraction... Make a luck about oneself, offer something to the world, and one will succeed. A lack of extensiveness in life is what so maddeningly nags me, and this photo I took on a walk in solitude near Crouch End, to the north of London, looking on to Alexandra Palace, was taken just before the onset of this year-long realisation and internal shift I've had. It is this very scene and sight you see, upon that day, the 9th of March, 2014, that I reflect back on when I begin to just figure this inhibition, and loneliness, and emptiness, and nothingness I have experienced, and attach that to my many other deepened reflections of life on Earth. Why should I be another one hundred or so billionth human but forgotten? I am so acutely aware of time; to tingle my five senses more; to absorb more, always. I value my life and living so bloody much that I'm enraged to act. I'm frenzied, seethe manically and yearn madly. I must go all out and hunt, swayed with my desperation to succeed in my quest for a madness; for a richness; for a filled life; for more extensive life experiences, about better people, beside an immense monetary wealth... Moreover, here and now, aged 18 in 2015, with my positional luck and the way technology's going, what could be at stake, should I live long enough, is a significantly lengthened life due to wealth, if not conscious immortality. I'd vow to control my pleasures and help the whole world enter the reality I dream of actualising, to justify why inequality would favour me so much so. There's so much more I could say... If ever I reside to making music, I'd heavily revolve around Deep House; and, this song would be my template, in terms of deepness. The extent to which this particular song has had an emotional impact on me has to be the kind of power and beauty I replicate within my own music. I aspire to create aural majesty greater than or equal to the power of this song's lachrymose reverberations... It's funny... The date that this song was released - the 21st of April, 2014 - is the rough date when everything began to truly change and ramp up for me. A month or so of weak contemplation, from the start of March when I went on that walk, really began to make an amplified meaning for itself right around the very surrounding days with which this song was released. That's a coincidence I only noticed today, note very much, and am frankly shocked by. Coincidence, and what's built up in me, is quite scary and fascinating really... My sanctuary's consumed and chewed at me.
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Album: Young Alaska ♦ © KI Records ♦ Released on the 21st of April, 2014
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Christian Löffler:
https://soundcloud.com/christianloeffler
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Buy it:
https://pro.beatport.com/track/notes-original-mix/5318562
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Image used:
https://i.ytimg.com/vi/RO-NLQTruPM/maxresdefault.jpg
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