My journey before and after the night that changed my life forever.
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Somebody once asked me "How do you feel being disabled?"
This was my response:
Imagine being able to walk one second and in the blink of an eye it being taken away from you. Let me tell you, it is one of the most frustrating and scary things imaginable.
I hate thinking about not being able to do something. Not being able to hangout and do stuff with my friends like regular teenagers. Not being able to go to school to learn and socialize. I hate listening to my friends talk about all the things they are doing, without me.
I hate being restricted and limited to the places I can and cannot go because of my inability to walk. It’s not fair.
I hate reminiscing about my life before. I can’t help but wonder where my life would be, and what it would look like if this accident didn’t happen.
I miss driving, I miss shopping at the mall with my friends. I miss everything so much.
I hate the stares I get everywhere I go, every turn I make.
Imagine.
Everyone knowing each aspect of your personal and private life. Everything there is to know about you. Everything you say, being written down and read off from nurse to nurse. Whether you’re am having a good or bad day, they all know about it. Everyone seeing every body part of yours. No privacy whatsoever. Having your life planned out on a strict schedule, leaving no room for spontaneous things. Yeah, that’s my life.
Imagine.
Your entire grade 12 year ruined, by a stupid moose. Feeling like your world is crashing down left, right and center… and there’s absolutely nothing you can do about it.
I know I make it look and seem easy sometimes, but the truth is there are a lot of times I just break down and cry.
I ask God, why me? What could I have possibly done to deserve this crappy hand I have been dealt?
It’s then I remember that God never gives you more than you can handle.
I remember that everything happens for a reason.
I remember I am still here, alive, and breathing.
I remember it could be so much worse. I could be dead I could be on a ventilator. I could be a vegetable.
But luckily, I'm not. I'm still me, Kiesha. I'm still mentally stable. I have family and friends who love and support me. I'm gaining new things everyday continuing to prove doctors wrong. Loving and living my life to the fullest.
Sure I can’t do all of the same things I used to, but I can do anything I set my mind to. I have realized that where there is a will, Kiesha finds a way.
If I truly believe I will walk again, I will. Life will be even better than before it will just take time. I remember all the amazing people I have met along this journey including nurses, therapists, and patients, that I would have never had the chance of meeting, if this accident never happened.
I will overcome this. I will be a miracle. I will walk again.
As my tattoo proclaims Fall down seven times, stand up eight, here's to standing up one more time than I've been knocked down.
